Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Cubs Sign Kim DeJesus' Husband To A 2-Year Deal

photo via @KimDeJesus12 (hope that's ok, Kim)
Kim DeJesus' already lucky husband got a little more fortunate today when he signed a 2 year contract with the Chicago Cubs worth 10 million dollars.

Kim's spouse spent 8 seasons with the Kansas City Royals and one - last season - with the Oakland A's. He has a .284 career batting average; hitting a total of 207 doubles, 50 triples, 71 home runs and 436 RBI. He also has a .356 on-base percentage, and a smoking hot wife.
The Cubs will introduce Mrs. DeJesus' significant other at a press conference from Wrigley Field tomorrow at 11 am. No word as of yet if Kim, a lifelong Cubs fan from Wheaton, Illinos, will be in attendance. (Hope so) 
Go Cubbies!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Catching Bartman

Well sir, I broke down and watched that there ESPN movie about that damn walking curse, Steve Bartman.  Now, I didn't want to because I figured it would be like watching old war footage and the nightmares would start up again, but I'd heard some of the boys down at the VFW talking about it, and they were sayin the whole thing was made to show that Bartman was a good guy and that the "Friendly Confines" weren't so friendly afterall.  Well, that got my damn blood a boilin, so I grabbed a couple Schlitz and the remote and got ready to start my own one-man A'Hole chant right there in my livin room.

The movie started off talkin about ol' Bill Buckner, who if you remember right, was a pretty damn good player back in his days at Wrigley til he went off to Boston and forgot how to field a grounder  Then came the talk of the 2003 season, and all these guys pourin salt on the wound of how good the Cubs were that season...and dammit the Cubs were good that year!!  We had Prior and Wood, Gonzalez and Karros, probably our best team in a damn long time. Then came the buildup to that Game 6 debacle that will forever be burned into my head.    3-0, top of the 8th, 5 outs away from the Series and Luis Castillo hits a foul ball the other way near the left field wall.  Alou's got a line on it, then...WTF?!  Some greedy green-turtlenecked, 1987 Walkman-wearin bastard wantin a souvenir to show his mommy when he got home, knocked it away, along with the hopes and dreams of almost 100 years of Cubs fans. 

I sat there watchin and takin a drink evertime they showed it.  I took it all in until it showed where the computer boys worked their magic and took away all of the fans from the video.  They could show that if no one had touched the ball, Alou would have caught it!!!...I couldn't take it any more so I grabbed my '84 Sandberg homerun ball and threw it through the TV.  And just so everyone knows, I caught it that ball way up away from the field where there was no way I would have ruined the Cubs chances of a pennant.  This Cub fan knows the rules of how not to screw your team and town...if only Bartman did too.

Johnny Davis

Friday, November 11, 2011

Restored Ernie Banks Statue Looks Spiffy

Ernie Banks' bronze statue returned to Wrigley Field today after a week of restoration, and boy does it look spiffy. Apparently the likeness of Mr. Cub was starting to turn green prematurely so they did what they had to do. For good measure they also brightened up the blue accents that were much more subtle when unveiled back in March of '08. That bright blue now matches Ronnie Santo over on Addison.

Let me tell ya, it's a real dandy!