Milking Wrigley Field and Painting it Purple

Today proves once again that the brain-trust over at Cubs Marketing doesn't believe in being subtle and they never miss out on an opportunity to milk Wrigley Field.

I believe you would agree that The Stadium has already been sufficiently "Northwestern-ized" for this Saturday's game. What with the Purple and White flags flying on every pole, oversized Northwestern banners hung on the West and to the South as well as eight more cluttering around our beautiful Wrigley Field Marquee. Dang heck, they even painted the right field wall window off of Sheffield Purple.

Well sir - apparently that wasn't enough, because they have decided to also paint the Wrigley Field marquee Purple. Not only are they temporarily defacing the landmark, they are also making sure they do it loudly; promoting and sponsoring it, complete with MasterCard billboards and Valspar paint cans. Because, you see - Wrigley Field isn't just a dandy place to watch a game, she is also a money making machine.

From The Vault: Bodysuited Dude Asked to Leave

Check out this dude. He shows up to a Cubs game in a full bodysuit. I'm talking head to toe red spandex... can't even see his eyeballs.

First off, one has to question the timing of this stunt. It is an midweek, low attended game. That kind of a effort deserves a Friday afternoon against the Cardinals... in the bleachers.

And besides looking odd, the dude didn't do anything at all to cause a commotion. He was even kind enough to remove his helmet for the national anthem (see below:)



But apparently there is some policy against these types of shenanigans because an inning later... security showed up and escorted the dude out like he was Steve Bartman

Cubs Skipper Search - Ignorance vs Incompetence

(image from http://www.mycubstoday.com)

I wouldn't say I'm a big fan of the Cubs new owner or their old General Manager. I'd say that the problem with Tom Ricketts is: He doesn't know what he is doing, and worse yet, he think Jim Hendry does.

And I believe this search for a new skipper is a good example of this battle between ignorance and incompetence.

I read a pretty interesting article this morning over at fanpeeps.com that talked about this very thing. The gentleman there argued that the skipper search has come down to Ricketts' choice: Ryne Sandberg vs Hendry' pick: Mike Quade. Mr. Ricketts did promise to that it was ultimately the decision of the General Manager, but that sounds to me like some sorta business-world jargon to cover his rear in case the decision goes south.

I guess my money would be on Quade at this point. Ricketts has to know that this is Hendry's last big decision as GM. If this new manager doesn't lead the Cubs to the promised land, somebody's going to have to take the fall. And you can't make Hendry the scapegoat if you take the decision out of his hands.

Well, actually Ricketts can and will make Hendry the scapegoat no matter what, but I'd still put a nickel on Quade.

Tyler Colvin Seen Wearing Tiki Idol

Tyler Colvin was seen wearing a Tiki Idol as a shard from an errant baseball bat impaled him in the chest. Perhaps it is the same idol Greg was wearing when he got into that serious surfing accident.

Tyler is doing ok in a Florida hospital, but he is done for the season.

Some people are pointing to this incident as proof that the Cubs are cursed but as our old pal Hank put it: "It kinda proves the opposite... If we were cursed he'd be dead".

Let's just hope Jeff Samardzija returns that Tiki Idol to its ancient burial ground before anyone else gets hurt.

Lolly Gaggers

I share the sentiments of the thousands who are not showing up. I've been through my share of bad seasons but this one takes the cake! Good riddance D. Lee, Theriot, Fontenot and whoever else we can unload. I can't even watch this s--- on tv. What a bunch of lolly gaggers. I guess there have been plenty of seasons this bad but not with the payroll. I could always blame the organization in the past but now we just have a bunch of overpayed lollygaggers. Maybe if we spent more time building a farm system than we spend building toyota signs we could have a winning season.

HANK

Alan Trammell & RBI

I wonder if Bench Coach Trammell ever brags about the fact that he was A speed and A contact, only Paul Molitor could say the same.

Does he also think Marlon Byrd is built like an RBI player?

I'm guessing Coach Trammell talks about this often with the current Cubbies.

And I'm certain, now that he has been told that he won't ever be the Cubs manager, he can forget about the stress of that job and the fact that he has a horrible record as a manager. Now he can focus on discussing and showcasing his A speed and A contact.

From what I hear, he is able to use his A contact to fungo a popfly straight-up to the catcher, then use his A speed to run to first base and back, pick up his fungo and hit the catcher in the back of the heel, thus distracting the catcher from making the catch.

Godspeed Sweet Lou

I watched on the news last night and heard about Lou Piniella's retirement following Sunday's game.

That was quite a drubbing they took at the hands of D. Lee and the Braves.

I wish him all the best and hope Lou's ailing mother goes peacefully.

Hank

The 5 Stages of Ted Lilly Grief

Here are some twitter pallys going thru the five stages of grief following the Cubbies trade of Theodore Roosevelt Lilly III:

Denial- Usually our first reaction to the loss of something we're attached to, is denial:


Anger- This stage of grief is probably the cause of the most pain:


Bargaining- Where we try to make deals to gain back what we lost:


Depression- The most dangerous stage of grief:


Acceptance- A decision to be at peace with the way things are:

Combo Deal

You know what? Maybe I'm missing something.

Maybe the Ricketts' braintrust really is onto something.

Maybe they are simply looking for just the right combination of oversized japanese car ads and clownish cheese noodles with less of those pesky "traditions" the rest of us Wrigley Field fans have come to love.

Maybe if they fiddle with this thing long enough they can figure out a way to turn the season around. Hell, burn down the ivy and we might just win the World Series!!!

Or maybe. . . this some sorta sick joke.

HANK

Cubs Unveil Updated "It's A Way Of Life" Campaign

The second half of the season begins tonight with the Philadelphia Phillies visiting Wrigley Field. To mark the occasion, The Chicago Cubs have updated their 2010 marketing campaign to something a tad more realistic.

Candy Store

I was lucky enough to attend my first game in the beloved bleachers a week or so back.

Let me tell ya: Kid in a candy store -

Here's What's Wrong With The Bleachers

I don't feel like restating my disgust for The Wave, but I do have another bone to pick with the current state of affairs in the bleachers. Just take a look at this photograph from last weeks game. Look how many of these youngsters are fiddling with their phones instead of fiddling with their beers or fiddling with each other, or .... I don't know, watching the gall-dern game!

Creepiest Cubs Mascot?

The Cubbies don't have an "official" mascot, but they do have a few characters that hang around the ballpark and do their best to root, root for the home team AND kind of creep everybody out.

Here are the four I've spotted this season, and I wanted to put it to a vote so there is a poll on the top right of the blog.

Your candidates for the Creepiest Cubs Mascot are:

#1 - Billy Cub

Not sure who this dude is, but if you google him you get an article titled: The Chicago Cubs Have an Unofficial Mascot… And He Is NOT a Pervert. My favorite aspect of this guy: his igloo cooler that he uses to collect tips.

#2 - The Hot Dog Guy

This mess of a mascot isn't even trying to work for the Cubbies, but I love the dude so I'm throwin him in anyway. He walks around trying get people to go to the Full Shilling up on Clark... when he isn't in the crapper, that is.

#3 Ivy Man

To be honest, I don't know a lot about this guy. He seems tall, likes to dress like the ivy and he generally just gives me the creeps.

#4 Ronnie Woo Woo

Most people who have gone to Wrigley know about Ronnie. He is homeless, somehow gets into every game, and the dude Woo! Woo! Woo's! wherever he goes. He got a little less creepy when the Cubs donated front teeth to him years ago, but still: a little creepy.

On Second Thought - Mr. Ricketts

Having a night to sleep on it; I think maybe I kind of over did it with my last "post". But there are just a few things that make my blood boil and Tommy boy just about touched all of them. I seriously don't care if I ever see the Cubs win another game as long as I can keep Wrigley Field the way it is or was. Does this idiot think every game is a sell out because we think the Cubs are going to win it all? Better yet does he think that a few more millions will magically make a sucky organization world champs? I don't think so. I am pretty sure the Cubs have just as much money as anyone else in the Central Division yet how often have we even made the playoffs? Time to re-evaluate your priorities TOM!

Dear Mr. Ricketts

Now I read what Cubs owner Mr. Ricketts had to say about his plans for Wrigley Field. Basically he said the Toyota Sign is going up, they are "studying" adding a Jumbotron, and selling the naming rights to Wrigley are "a real possibility."

Someone needs to sit that boy down and have a serious and I do mean serious talk with him. This is totally irrational thinking by an owner of the last shrine to Americas game. I guess my love affair with the cubs and the idea of professional baseball will end with the jumbotron at " CORPORATE SELLOUT FIELD".

I hope that a world series ring will fulfill your dreams Mr. Ricketts. Because you will be crushing the last bastion of hope for anyone who believes in doing what is right. I do at my ripe old age still believe that in the end it's not about who wins or loses but how you play the game!

HANK

City Council gives OK to Toyota sign at Wrigley

They approved that Japanese car company advertisement. It says here they said that there sign "will not adversely affect the significant historical or architectural features" of Wrigley Field.
Also says that this isn't the last step if our Alderman Mr. Tunney calls for City Council approval. We will see.

UPDATE: The council voted 8-1 (one yellow-belly didn't vote) to approve it, but Mr. Tunney is now officially against the sign and says they will have to go through the City Council.

The Wave At Wrigley Field - My Response

Who did the Wave? Was it a bunch of White sox fans who got lost on the north side?

It's over, bulldoze it and build some more condos. I guess I can die knowing that I was there when it was real, fun, and not another circus that's about everything but baseball. I am sick. They can put up all the Japanese corporate advertising they want, I have TOTALLY LOST ALL HOPE.

SO READY TO NOT BE ON THIS PLANET ANYMORE

HANK

Football Returns to Wrigley Field

I read in the paper that they are going to let them play football again in Wrigley Field. It surely has been awhile. My brother Harold is going over his books to figure out how long it has been and our employment challenged friend of the blog put together this here model... Perhaps he has a little too much time on his hands.

Toyota Sign Math

I just pulled out my trusty calculator.
Let's see here, the Cubs pay Alfonso Soriano 17 Million dollars per year.
The Toyota Billboard they want to put in (which by the way, will stay in the outfield a hellofa lot longer than Mr. Soriano will) is estimated to make the Cubs 2.5 Million dollars per year.

If my math is correct, that means:
That Toyota sign will make the Cubs enough money to pay Soriano to play just under 24 games.

ridiculous

Clark and Addison Billboard

You should of seen the look on my Hanks face when I showed him this picture.
Not sure why they have this ad here.

Opening Day

Ahh! Spring is here again. Opening day always gives me a warm and tingly feeling. Kind of like when I wet in my depends. If we win one today thats great, but I have learned over the past 100 years not to get my hopes up. So drink as many barly pops as you can today and punch the mai-tai guy in the nuts if you see him. GO CUBS!!!!!!

Good Mornin Opening Day

Good Mornin Opening Day The sun is up for Opening Day 2010

Introducing: The Cubs Hope-O-Meter

Yesterday, the Cubbies played their first Spring Training game.
Hope was in the air as they quickly ran out to a 4-0 lead.
That was soon replaced with despair... as they ended up getting shellacked 15-7.

Below is a graphical display of a typical Cubs fans reaction to the game:



I'm calling it the Hope-O-Meter